The Sandwich Generation . . . Helping Your Aging Parents
by Carol Abaya, M.A.
for release October 15, 1999
Are you juggling doing errands for your aging parents, your children,
yourself and working at the
same time? Are you tired, stressed out and upset that your once vibrant
parent is now frail and
needy?
Do you feel alone? Rest assured you are not alone! The Sandwich Generation
is dedicated to the
50 million Americans who may have elder/parent care concerns and/or
responsibilities.
DON'T PAY UNCLE SAM MORE THAN NECESSARY
Question: I've had to take over my father's (85) finances. Until now,
I had no idea what he had.
The amount is more than the $650,000 that can be ôwilledö
(left to heirs) without having to pay
taxes. What should I do?
Answer: Regardless of how much over the $650,000 mark, don't rush to
"gift" or transfer money
or other assets. You might make mistakes that can be more costly in
the end. And do not put bank
accounts or assets in joint names -- e.g. yours and your father's.
You're endangering your father's
money.
* If the amount is a little over $650,000, don't worry too much. Make
sure your father has
sufficient income from his investments to cover his care and living
costs. This is the first priority.
Then he might "gift" money to family members -- yourself, other children
and/or grandchildren.
He can gift up to $10,000 a year to as many people as he wants to.
Or he can pay for his
grandchildren's college tuition. The check should be payable directly
to the college, and not the
grandchild.
* If the amount is well over $650,000, you should sit down with a certified
elder-law attorney
who is also knowledgeable about tax implications. Do not use the lawyer
who closed on your
home purchase to develop an estate plan.
* Identify several and then interview them beforehand. Make sure they
are really knowledgeable.
The National Academy of Elder Law Attorneys (520-881-4005) can give
you names of certified
attorneys in your area. Or you can write to me and I'll send you some
names.
* As you handle his finances, make an inventory of what he has and do
keep very careful records
of what you do and the bills you pay.
* * *
Question: My uncle recently passed away. My aunt (83) is extremely worried
about what will
happen to my cousin (48) who is disabled, if she has to go into a nursing
home. She wants to
make sure my cousin has enough money for his care. We need sound advice.
Answer: Sound advice will come only from an attorney who specializes
in disability and Medicaid
law and estate planning. The most common vehicle, however, is to transfer
some assets into a
trust solely for the benefit of your cousin. Assets in this kind of
trust are not included in your
aunt's assets if she needs Medicaid paid-for nursing home care.
* * *
Question: My parents, finally, have signed Power of Attorney and Living
Wills and want to put
them in their vault for safe keeping. Their friends are telling them
to keep the documents at home.
What happens if there is a fire? Guidance please.
Answer: Whoever has POA should also be on the bank's vault card for
easy access. I keep copies
at home and the original in the vault. My eldest has a POA at
the bank. In the case of
Testamentary Wills, if your state law freezes your bank access to vaults
after death, do keep the
original with the lawyer. Or the person who has POA, if he/she lives
nearby, can get the will from
the vault toward the end. I keep certain important papers and files
in fire proof cabinets at home.
* * *
Do you have a question? Send it in. Although letters cannot be answered
individually, appropriate
letters will be answered in this column whenever possible. Letters
may be edited. Send letters to
Ms. Carol Abaya, c/o Name\Address of YOUR newspaper or e-mail her at
SandwchGen@aol.com.
Carol Abaya is an international-award-winning journalist and creator
of the unique magazine The
Sandwich Generation: You & Your Aging Parents.
NOTES TO EDITORS: text = words; other material = 160 words
We would appreciate it if you would include the "Globe Syndicate" bug at the end of the column.
©1999 by Globe Syndicate, all rights reserved.