Globe Syndicate
For release Friday July 25, 2003
The Sandwich Generation . . . Helping Your Aging Parents
by Carol Abaya, M.A.
FAST ACTION CAN PREVENT STROKE DAMAGE
1st of 2 Parts
To the reader in Sacramento who wants guidance for legal and financial affairs
because she has no relatives: Please send me your mailing address and I will
refer you to a reliable lawyer.
Question: My mother, 73, lives with my sister and two teenagers. My mother
passed out in the supermarket, and fortunately there was an EMS person in the
store. The doctor says she had a stroke. How can that be? She doesn’t have high
blood pressure. What do we do now?
Answer: A person can have a stroke regardless of blood pressure level. A stroke
is caused by a blood clot which deprives the brain of oxygen. If drugs are given
within three hours of the stroke, damage can be minimized.
You, your sister and her children should be trained in CPR, which should be used
only if the person stops breathing.
Otherwise, slapping the person on the face and/or chest can help restart the
blood flow to the brain. And of course call 911 immediately.
Stroke TIPS from the American Stroke Association:
• When lying a stroke victim down, lower the head. Blood flow improves.
• Blood-clotting drugs can be safely used regardless of a person’s age. Elderly
patients can benefit.
• Ask the doctor what foods should be avoided as some adversely impact the
effectiveness of medicines.
Question: My father, 84, has had several mini-strokes in the past five years.
After the latest one, he seems confused and has trouble talking. He gets very
frustrated and has started throwing temper tantrums. My husband starts yelling
at him to shut up. I’m in the middle.
Answer: Everyone in the family needs to understand that your father's
frustrations are a normal reaction to sudden disability. Yelling will not change
the fact that permanent brain damage has occurred and will not achieve anything
positive.
Speech therapy might help a little. I’m emphasizing “a little,” because often
nothing is going to change.
Don’t become impatient when he has trouble getting out words. If he reaches a
point where the words are stalled, pick up the conversation. See if your
perception of what he wanted to say is correct.
My father struggled and often said he knew what he wanted to say, but the words
couldn't come out. In the last couple of years, conversations consisted of very
simple words, often with hand movements for emphasis.
Reassure him that you understand his frustrations and it’s OK not to be able to
hold a full conversation. A hug now and then is also helpful.
Question: My aunt, 79, passed out last weekend at a family picnic. The doctor
says it was a TIA and that we shouldn’t worry. How can we not worry?
Answer: A TIA is a mini-stroke and may not be indicate of anything other than
not enough oxygen in the brain at that instance. Often there are no after
affects.
In the heat of summer, an older person can pass out from dehydration, and this
may have been what happened. Everyone needs to drink more during hot weather.
Are you juggling doing errands for your aging parents, your children, yourself
and working at the same time? Are you tired, stressed out and upset that your
once vibrant parent is now frail and needy?
Do you feel alone? Rest assured you are not alone! The Sandwich Generation is
dedicated to the 50 million Americans who may have elder/parent care concerns
and/or responsibilities.
* * *
Do you have a question? Send it in. Although letters cannot be answered
individually, appropriate letters will be answered in this column whenever
possible. Letters may be edited. Send letters to Ms. Carol Abaya, mail direct to
her at PO Box 132, Wickatunk, NJ 07765-0132 or contact her through her web site:
thesandwichgeneration.com.
Carol Abaya is an international-award-winning journalist and creator of the
unique magazine The Sandwich Generation: You & Your Aging Parents.
NOTES TO EDITORS: text = 491 words; other material = 160 words
We would appreciate it if you would include the "Globe Syndicate" bug at the end
of the column.
©2003 by Globe Syndicate, all rights reserved.