Globe Syndicate

For release Friday August 22, 2003


The Sandwich Generation . . . Helping Your Aging Parents

by Carol Abaya, M.A.


PROTECTION OPTIONS FOR
SINGLE SENIORS

Question: I will retire soon and have been putting my financial and other personal matters in order. I am single with no close relatives. I’m concerned about the future when I will need help. What options do people like me have? I’m scared of being taken advantage of and having my assets stolen.

Answer: You are not alone in your predicament.

My attorney (who I would trust with my life) recommends the following:
• set up a revocable living trust at a bank that has an active trust department;
• find an elder law attorney and accountant, have appropriate legal documents drawn up, and establish on-going relationships;
• look into alternative living arrangements, particularly CCRCs (continuing care retirement communities).

In all of these areas, you need to do some research. In the end, you need to feel comfortable with all your decisions.

• Living Trust with a bank: Identify stable banks in your area that have trust departments and actively interview the head of the department.

Look at the package of services offered. Will they pay your bills? How do they handle estate matters after you’ve gone? Will they handle personal care and living arrangements? What tasks will they do? What are their fees? Who will be involved - and do you feel comfortable with that person?

With a revocable living trust you can be the trustee or co-trustee and handle all your financial affairs as long as you want to. If you are not happy with the arrangements, you can change the bank or their trustee as long as you are able to.

While an attorney should be used to draw up the legal documents, he/she would not have the investment and accounting expertise that a bank has.

• Living arrangements: There are many options, the two primary being
(1) Remain in your own home with live-in help when needed, using long term health care insurance to help pay the cost or
(2) CCRCS.

CCRCs have several levels of living accommodations and care. You can have your own apartment for as long as you want. When you start needing help, the facility will provide it either in your own unit or in an assisted living section. If you need skilled nursing care, this is also available on site.
You can thus establish a relationship with people who will provide care as needed, for your entire life.

I know two ladies near me who moved into a CCRC when they were in their late 60s. One has been there 14 years, still drives, and retains her independence. Yet she feels secure knowing help is there 24 hours a day when she needs it.

Everyone, regardless of age or family situation should have:
• Durable Power of Attorney, appointing someone else to help with financial matters and
• Living Will, detailing medical treatment and end-of-life preferences and appointing someone else to make decisions if you cannot do so.



Are you juggling doing errands for your aging parents, your children, yourself and working at the same time? Are you tired, stressed out and upset that your once vibrant parent is now frail and needy?

Do you feel alone? Rest assured you are not alone! The Sandwich Generation is dedicated to the 50 million Americans who may have elder/parent care concerns and/or responsibilities.



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Do you have a question? Send it in. Although letters cannot be answered individually, appropriate letters will be answered in this column whenever possible. Letters may be edited. Send letters to Ms. Carol Abaya, mail direct to her at PO Box 132, Wickatunk, NJ 07765-0132 or contact her through her web site: thesandwichgeneration.com.

Carol Abaya is an international-award-winning journalist and creator of the unique magazine The Sandwich Generation: You & Your Aging Parents.

NOTES TO EDITORS: text = 498 words; other material = 160 words

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