Globe Syndicate
For
release
The Sandwich Generation . . . Helping Your Aging Parents
by Carol Abaya, M.A.
PETS ADD LOVE TO A HAPPIER
LIFE SPAN
Question: My father, 72, is thinking
about moving into a senior apartment and wants to take his 6-year-old dog. The dog is large and well trained. However, the landlord is not happy about the
dog. We’re trying to discourage my father from taking his pet. How can we convince him?
Answer: Some states, by
law, landlords cannot prevent seniors from having pets, unless the pet is not
properly controlled or cared for.
Consult your state housing department.
The
questions you should be asking yourself are: Can your father properly take care
of the dog? Can your father safely
(given the dog’s size) walk the dog at least twice a day? Does the dog bark excessively, which would
disturb other tenants?
If your
father cannot walk the dog himself, is there a family member or someone else
nearby who can walk the dog and carry in the bags of food, which can be heavy?
If your father can care for the dog himself or with
minimal help then you should help your father keep his pet.
Remember,
your father has lost a lot in recent years.
If he is leaving his home of many years, he is losing more of his
life. He needs to retain something he
loves. Animals give unconditional love.
Pet
owners feel “needed” by another living being.
Being “needed” helps a person retain his/her own self esteem and
feelings of “worth.” This is important
as a person ages and loses capabilities and loved ones.
Also,
reliable scientific studies clearly show that pets in a person’s life, go a
long way in helping the person remain healthier, both emotionally and
physically. Having a pet, whether a dog,
a cat or even a bird, helps keep down a person’s blood pressure and stress
level. Stroking a cat, scratching a dog
behind the ears, talking to a bird are all stress reducers. Pets also help reduce loneliness and
depression.
Question: My mother, 68, lives alone,
100 miles from us. Her dog of 15 years
just died, and she wants to get another one right away. We feel she shouldn’t be tying herself down
to another pet at her age. Advise
please.
Answer: Regardless of age, coming
home to an empty house can make a person feel lonely and depressed. Being greeted by a tail-wagging dog can bring
a smile to a person’s face and uplift spirits.
Many
loving pets are available at animal shelters and need loving homes. An older dog, one to three years old and
already housebroken, can be appropriate.
The size should depend on “letting out” or walking capabilities. Also, a short haired dog requires less
grooming.
Your mother is still young and as long as she can take care of the dog you should encourage her. Your mother, not you, should make the decision and choose what she wants.
Are you juggling doing errands for your aging parents, your children, yourself and working at the same time? Are you tired, stressed out and upset that your once vibrant parent is now frail and needy?
Do you feel alone? Rest assured you are not alone! The Sandwich Generation is dedicated to the 50 million Americans who may have elder/parent care concerns and/or responsibilities.
* * *
Do
you have a question? Send it in. Although letters cannot be answered
individually, appropriate letters will be answered in this column whenever
possible. Letters may be edited. Send letters to Ms. Carol Abaya, mail direct
to her at
Carol Abaya is an international-award-winning journalist and creator of the unique magazine The Sandwich Generation: You & Your Aging Parents.
NOTES TO EDITORS: text = 544 words; other material = 160 words
We would appreciate it if you would include the "Globe Syndicate" bug at the end of the column.